11 Oct, 2016

bleh x.x

dead so dead

19 Sep, 2015

What the hell man

Whaat? Now I can't even change my pro pic? Fuck this ?(???)

27 Aug, 2015

Bored of this site

Let's kik or text (σ???)σ

18 Jun, 2015

"been awhile, where you been?"

Theres been a disturbance in the force e_e

21 Apr, 2015

1 lunatic 1 ice pick

Whoa made my stomach turn..

20 Apr, 2015

Trace the lines

No notes but imprints in the dirt. My raw emotion shrouded my fear. Kicking at rocks along the way. I knew what the world could to an innocent. Not that im anything of the sort. I took roads like this before. A day when purity had been robbed of. The last thriving light about me. But that isn't what I come to reveal. The kind of beings I bare in mind would become dime a dozen due to the bulls hitters. Gone in seconds. Slipping away quietly. I just walk out of lives. And to those I was bound by blood I'd love to forget. I know I made lasting impressions in lives. But to who extent should I stay. No other than mine. Just remain as a habit. Maybe the its the pain of not saying goodbye. I need it more than you

19 Apr, 2015

so, Skyrim

I s*** at it .~.

17 Apr, 2015

so...whoa

That deep web man..o~o

17 Apr, 2015

from yours truely

Happy birthday Avi Kaplan ?

02 Apr, 2015

yes!

finally changed my f***ing pro pic...ugh yeah you guys were such a help such great lovely friends i have pssh..

31 Mar, 2015

fxcktards ?(???? )

Hey just like my f**book more people blocked than my friends list xP livin' that peaceful life ?

31 Mar, 2015

yeah, i don't care

Meanwhile, your sitting in the dark still listening to the chili peps missing me. but I gave up on you long ago. Hope you see this. Buh bye ?

23 Mar, 2015

i spy x3

Ha I see mah f**book page hai meh:3

23 Mar, 2015

pssh - _-

These "fans" most of them don't get online..miss ya though ?

01 Feb, 2015

The crazy young

Many dreamt moments I wake up when we touch but please stay longer kind dream Let me enjoy this with you With guided happiness and loneliness forgets me. Im free. Smiling as ever please let this be forever. But unfair as my life has kept me until you first spoke to me Nowhere do I bear in mind of the last goodbye. Only just your heartwarming hellos. If I could just tell you im in love with you

01 Feb, 2015

On standby

"Tell me again. How much you love me?" With heart in hand. Handing to you. All that happened, all that I felt. I cannot forget, dear significant It is finally now, I can feel you slipping away from my mind. Never having to, reminiscence. Playing back on repeat. Your drifting away on an ash.

01 Feb, 2015

The other poet I once loved

I was the new kid still your approach was by mistake. Accidental friends. Yeah guess you could say And my misstep had been when I fell for you. The depths I had went I still question like a drunken night. But you kept me around. Maybe for attention though the love you never mention wouldn't have it Then you would pull out your notebook of poems you've made. Stuck between the pages, folded my poems I written for you. My, you hurt me. While I watched the girl you chose over me overlooked, just a friend. I still have your poems. I loved for years but for you just months

01 Feb, 2015

I can only try to kiss away your insecurities

Outlining lips with fingertips while you smile. Gazing, watching trying to capture your beauty onto metaphors or sketches That perfection to stop your questions of why Turn your flaws to an admirable trait. Hush your negativity and kiss me

01 Feb, 2015

"I'll keep the monsters away"

Quite f***ed up the things we done and said. But still stand alongside the closest i have ever stand with anyone The longest kisses. Warmest palm in my hands. Tangle and entwine fingers. The tightest hold onto another. And your all mine? It quite sweet to be the memorable first. But if you'd been me then this is pure happiness than i ever been

01 Feb, 2015

No more scars

Dabbing the alcohol. Wrist face up. Winching and looking away. Sanitize me. How wrong to stop a constant breaking that become a habit. And stop loving me? Oh no no no dear its not that easy Ever I asked you stop playing? I do not dare because its what you love Though you'll never get to see this its something for the ruins You have me so much with bother of the greatest lesson in life. The obstacles in love and I fallen for you? Hard to understand when at the time. When our worlds were so different and I desperately invite you inside. Trying to keep you awhile longer. Ending with shotg** in the chest. Laying on the pavement. Tears almost endless. Its hard to breathe I cant see the stars we had once promised to see together How dare you to take such a leave. I know its hard to understand when I reached for that razor But all in all, I'm here to say to not only you That yes, I have stopped for myself.

01 Feb, 2015

You don't haunt me anymore

I come to you and lie to you "I stopped hurting myself" Only to just know it makes you smile though I can never see it The lasting inspiration far from the romance that was meant to be when alone of these thoughts of you Allowing your once threshold power I couldn't utter aloud Yet scribbled onto many letters that were never sent I wish I could make you understand instead of coming off sounding still so crazy When really it wasn't you it was how beautiful it felt falling Feeling weightless. That I wasn't alone though it was wrong to be so exposed It was the right choice to have finally walked away. As I express this confess that clean cut. There's no blood to fall nor me over you

01 Feb, 2015

Theres nothing between the lines

I find myself seeking for reminders to try revive the joys I had felt. Casting a flurry of flutters on memory lane. Though I cannot help but notice the raw emotions that been setting in only brings clarity. Wish I could breathe a word of apology through a fault no other than your own. But I'm still here building on reasons of why am I still here. Smile along and carry on

04 Dec, 2014

The cries in the night

I'm not finished hear me out. Then your turn. Lacerated love, come and bruise me again. Remind me of a time where I second guess love in all its blind beauty. Where the creatures of my hell nail me inside of my coffin Shut out. And yet you stand there. I see it. In your eyes. Not you, too

04 Dec, 2014

Disposable

Speak of a person, like no other in existence. By blood is all I see This will never be perfect, than I will hold you to. What whispers in the dark, you speak of? Turn what I, inside am onto you What more will you say now? Finally draw me in your depths of what this is? Slapped on label "love." Might you tred safely of the long term side effects? I recommend it, if your stuck with me

04 Dec, 2014

My fault

Dawning on again, smiling while the tears run What I push to threat comes to hurt me in return When I force that blade onto you I wish you would end me But instead I'm here falling over, weak I'm bleeding for you darling come cry with me. For the worthwhile I'll break But be there when I wake

04 Dec, 2014

My disobedience

Take me another drive in memories. Washed by the thousand fallen tears in Toki's fur. Would you help pull it away? My raining blood of so called stupidity? I'll hide away so you won't leave just yet We're mearly just two souls trying not to die alone With a chokehold of established reality And pretend together. I love you

08 Oct, 2014

Bid fare thee well

Play the sweet warm string of lies. My, your so charming. Plunge it right to where I feel it. Your wished, left hanging on the noose I tied for you. Care to step in? Special. One of the kind. Indeed I am. Yet I allowed you to see your dream. One blink. Goes away. I'm much more. Similar joy I fought for played like this. Here I am, scars and all. Don't question me. I'll set aflame your notes of love. Its not about play. Don't f*** with me.

27 Sep, 2014

In sane we trust

Wrongful acts brought us closer Feelings cutting deeper Through this ritual sacrifice We're find happiness in this But to become alive in reality Might the world seem brighter? Wait and seek Surely, what will come kills loneliness Surrendering heart and soul Far greater we become one

27 Sep, 2014

Our heaven is just waiting

At first sight never imagined stemming of the thousands memories are to be born. Become real. Still blossom behind the boundaries. None of this we'll stop us from imagining what could be Honey, I love to stay and dwell but will your wishes of "dream of me" Be only nightmares? You've given me a taste of my greatest memory Miles and miles, I could feel you reach. Your warmth leaves me burning So please, smile and take my breath away once more

24 Sep, 2014

Just like old times

My eyes can't leave you. Brimming with tears. Mouth your name through the glass that stands between us. Your stare back completely oblivious I'm breaking down. Smiling wryly in return. There's the clenching inside in my chest. Like the times, you held me not ready to say goodbye while I cried if I'm ever going to see you again. It all came rushing back. I loved you then I love you still.

24 Sep, 2014

The Old House

Broken down but overgrown sounds what best to make of this mess. Where the beginning only started to make sense. If I could visit once more, Dig through the ashes for more memories I promise to not pick another broken glass and stain your burial. Walk room by room that once stand don't seem so big anymore. Thank you for the memories, though they weren't perfect but they taught me alot. Last dance with the flames. I imagined your light caught everyone's eye in that dark lonely night. Your were beautiful

24 Sep, 2014

Smile, stranger

Under the strobe lights while bathe in the melody. Lost in herself. Eyes closed drifting where the music takes her. Slowly moving. Nevermind the eyes melt of her. Its just her. Alone but peaceful. "Is this how nirvana feels? Or death?" For once the feeling of beauty within blooms. "I feel...powerful" Sway away of all kept her hidden. This is not her but she's far gone. Another innocence stripped of her. The dark cloaks her with chills. Not that she minds. Still so lost. To be noticed in greed. Frightening, sickening. Does she care?

17 Sep, 2014

Alluring Angel

Then- Oh my.. so innocent but another fool Smitten. New touch of sensual sends chills. Every one arise to awoken from lavished words. I've grown to become the submissive for your wildest dreams Luxuriously s**y. Hear me stroke the deepest part of you. Just you listen. Melt for me. defy like ride of delight with a twist Now- ages ago still you linger around. Choose not to forget. Miss you too Reminiscent thats when times were aflame. Alive Oh the leaps i would've made. Now im the one left melting.

27 Aug, 2014

The war within

It is quiet. Lurking cautious he enters. Even in the brightest day still remains the darkest. Like her soul. A four wall barricade of emptiness. Adjustment peers in the bleakness. Finding her at her lowest. But something odd sets him off, what's the slight glint cast off the moonlight gloom? She doesn't dare to look at him. Cradling the cold metal. "Just one, could be the end of it all. Finally" This warms her poor heart. He moves in closer now realizing. "Oh..no" Terror crosses his face. "Don't. Please." Whispers pleading. Thousands times before he look upon her face seeing the same empty blank expression still remain a beauty. Concern and asks, "Who hurt you?" Winces and bottom lip quivering. Another wave of tears come streaming. "Face of reality, we cannot fight them all. I grown tired love." Her voice breaks down to the shaking whisper "How much do you love me?" "Miles and miles. Always." He can't stand seeing her like this. Without the guilt that he failed at her happiness. "Then join me. Together, we fall." She smiles through the tears. The flashbacks of under the stars where promises were made. "No. Together, we can be strong. Just stay with me" Intertwines his hand with hers. Taking a firm grip from the g**. She buries her face in his chest. Then releases her grip. "Forgive me." Sobbing as he holds her close and tight. He hears a click but dismisses it. Now remembering his mothers ring hidden in his jacket pocket. Taking her by the hand. The g** is tossed on the bed. Silhouettes play on display. A flash of light pulse. All in a second, through her head. She falls. He can't move. Nor can't interpret. His hands raise in sight splashed in warmth of her escaping crimson. The same hands that caressed and held her "...fuck"

01 May, 2014

Its only internal

Ignorance and aggression are taking into place. Playing over and over stuck on continuous. The look on his face. The rage. The fear The astonished. Im fixed on you. No...this cant be you. Everything slows while falling. The pavement and i meet. Blood? But..I cant feel. Please dont let this be real. Collapsing, I'll stand down. Just go away.

24 Oct, 2013

Take it away I never had it anyways

Eating away. Like the flesh you solemnly kiss. Through doubt if wanting acceptance wishing away. Careful dear, what is carelessly labeled "love" I might just destroy it. Fuxk off and walk away as a stranger. Make note not just subjected to games of satisfactory but been there and suffered through it. In the trips of the fire like those of Hell. The losing and starting over. Again. Alone. Dullend over time. Nothing new. Just an idiosyncratic routine

25 Sep, 2013

Promise me a tomorrow for a goodbye

In the moment of departure, its all silence, yet holding on. Close and tight Of all we shared this will always be the hardest. Need not say another word beloved in this frailty just hold a smile and never stop telling me you love me But know one day, with the hopes you bless me. It'll be everyday I'd wake up and see you Continue on, make mistakes. I'll return knowing I need you. Keep on sharing the rays of light on the shadows of the doubt because I love how unreal it feels Memories are made from ashes of our secret silence romance kept even from ourselves. Meanwhile, searching for delights to alter. Only in fantasies we may. Keep in mind, your abused hope that was grown. A romance apology, your wish. Nevertheless, forgive me Lets remember we got here together. No more hiding. Gentle you care. Passion, you show. Unique, I see. Love me through the insecurity. I'll show you a world to fulfill your void. No worries dear I'm right here

22 Aug, 2013

MindFuxk

Controlling, shreds of happiness. Beautiful calling. I hear your voice Hand in mine. Hopes to which is just imagined Leading on. The strings I pluck of your heart. Just to hear a tune Playing. Sweet lullaby. Serenade feign romance. Greet of false promises only you want. Lay upon the demands, I won't follow along. Release of dreams played, I'll cut mine away. Take a step away let my tears left falling. I feel I don't need the safe security your warmth reliefs of me When you hold me. Grow cold. Hoping it reach my heart. Pleasure me the wish to not feel. Maybe then, I'd stop falling. Instead, fall into pieces.

22 Aug, 2013

Unconditionally, Hansel

It is now you come to mind, not only quicken my heart But bleed out a tear thinking you could have been mine again Funny how delusions are just vivid lies, overruning whats real Wondering with racing thoughts of you, why the false hope my dear significant? Had I not known these feelings lingered but then again I would have never confessed this to keep you in my life Impossible to not have the one who showed the nonexistence to light To still be a apart of my heart

20 Aug, 2013

Oh my god....

havent been on here for so loooong! lol

07 May, 2013

Hate Me

Shattered. Break of the loss What is of the fault? Mines, I want to believe. Yours? Impossible. Or what I wish to think... Yet words you speak of me. I feel the razor. Sweet addiction. Please stop. Could this be real? Could you? Your true face? No. It can't be. Every f***ing attempt you stray to my side. Push away. Ignore of what "was" Hoping you'd stay away. The small moments, we share. I want to cry out, "Who exactly are you pretending for!?" Never wating to see everything is a lie But it was all "then." Drifting in ashes. Damned past. Vital vein, keeping me from saying "Goodbye."

18 Apr, 2013

Ghostly silhouette

Awake to summon. Pitful. Around for another try Give to sacrifice. Dont be afaid. Take my hand You wont go through this alone. Through a promise, keep me in a grasp. If regret, unconditionally. Give you a heart for mine. Hide more than what is led on. Dont mind, strip me of the ravishing waste Beautiful ressurection. Beat again faster. Do you see of the fear? Carrying me off. For a coffin, heart-shaped. Light, if you will. Dont worry. If once again befalls upon I, Reality in surrealism, pull me of the grave. Feel it beathe? Beathe of immortalilty? Question is, how to know if such a thing is real? Grow of skin and bones. Show yourself out of the shadows. Out of sea. Wherein as lost as our souls are meant to be. Where are you my dear soulmate?

17 Apr, 2013

random post

nice im on the brithday shout outs :3

15 Apr, 2013

Beautiful sinful

Love is quiet. Yet, I dont mind its over-ruling. Battle, if so. Feeling I cant live nor go on without a taste of it. But falling for it. Under delusions of lies I created. For as long as I walked this earth. Craving for, living to strive for. Love is what I wish to have warmly introduce by my dear creations. Never having to reach for a substance to show through. Extend a hand to help me. Show me, love can be fair. Maybe far then I wont see it as a struggle of worthiness in my part for my existence. Rather not be seen as an illusion in cost of me. Please dont be a fear. To watch it fade. Lose its very meaning. With-hold a possession so strong to leave burises. Why must you be so powerful? Maybe then, you wouldnt be my curse I sercretly fear....

15 Apr, 2013

This is for you

Would you keep in mind our murderous romance? Does it linger? Memories? The pain to depart? For me, it had. "Fxck it all" The one whom truely accepted me. I lost. The hear the sound of your dark voice. Sends the calming chills over my body. Once possessed in love. Almost forget you were once mine. Over a year, my love had lasted for you. You return. Happy. What I always wanted to see in you. But I must confess. Searching through old journal entries in your name. Words, sketchings of what use to be. Poems I written for you Tells of us. Our wishes. To die with each other. "With you, for you" I never had written of another lover. You were the great significant meaning I see your face, your smile. The man I fallen for. I'd die for to prove my love But this time I'm not in love. I'm in intoxicated by what I'll never have anymore Yet, I'm happy for you. And I never Forgot "I love you. No...I'm IN love with you"

02 Apr, 2013

All i ever wanted

The first ever heard, laying in bed comfort in warmth. With thoughts of my beloved at the time. The word sung so gently. Bringing tears, so beautiful so real. Within a year, we depart former love. Felt a goodbye not saying word but leaving memory left only in tears. Farewell mein liebe Again, months followed meeting a handsome man. His voice, his accent, laugh. Once again, im in love. Take a chance, a risk. I want to be yours. One day, we spoke then he played the song. Shocked, the tears arise. Ridding history for these moments with him was to come, it was not meant to be. There, was our song. Together we sang. My tears had only fell of happiness. But never say forever. Soon, to fade. Fend for myself as everything had been from the start. Toward the end of this chapter, i love you lost its meaning i hadnt bother to say it to him or even hear it. Fear grew, realizing the prefections were soon to fall apart. We...were falling apart Lets not do anything. Throw what we worked for in the fire. Eat away at everything and try to walk away. Standing in ashes, why cant i move? The cello strungs along with the gutiar. Oh how beautiful i forget it sounds. I let to play, hold back tears but bleed my emotions for him as I write this. "And I could tell you that you're all I've ever wanted, dear I could utter every word you'd ever hope to hear.I shudder when I think that I might not be here forever, forever, forever" Airborne Toxic Event Brandon <|3

27 Mar, 2013

Caress carelessness

Just as death appeared almost taking along the love I strive for. It isn't here...where has it gone? Is it dead? This buried desire only had been a void. I search to feel what I know isn't lost. There, I only found what bleeds my poor heart. Cloaking loneliness took me in its cold grasp. Still, I venture out find it, damage and bruised.

27 Mar, 2013

What scars that fade?

A past through poetry Words could not speak What I hold in tormented hope Emotional cries, confessional fears through imagery What I faced not to fight anymore Writing such experience Knowing these words wont be heard All the loneliness I felt drowning from before Scars I cant see No one else has Just beautiful secrets

19 Mar, 2013

Silent Blessing (To Him)

A remaining wish, just to vanish But it is star-like soul, I can hold Distant, but there. A smile appears knowing your trying to be there Warm hearted desire, breathe not of your fire. Shall not let the lies lay ahold. For they shall not have control. Left broken in time. Still, your not mine. Only in drifting memory. Yet, must it be me? Only and only kiss? Must it be amiss? Our to share. Ours to forget. In my heart, I know I can never ask for more. A dear friend...nothing more.

19 Mar, 2013

Untitled. For Her

As I fell for you, you took my heart away. As you got closer to me, I came closer. When you pull me, I follow you. When you go, I walk alone. When you came, I would come. As I knew you more, I felt scared. As I felt scared, I didn't want to hurt you. But as I hurt you, I fell apart. As I knew these pieces would come back together Once again, I fall for you

19 Mar, 2013

Admirer. To Him

Am I deluded? Please let it be But aren't you here to stop me? These tears fall, remain untouched I grow cold in the absence of your warmth i would just sit and listen to every emotion bled poem Just to hear what you feel is real But it is I, who is convinced of lies What my heart has to with-hold are but a quiet whisper Of a ghost, just to be told

19 Mar, 2013

|||

I held her as close as I could knowing that this may be the last time I embraced her. Throughout the remainder of the night, my hands became the tissues for her tears, and as the day came, I left. The days go on with regularity, over and over, one day indistinguishable from the next. Sleep has become a memory, a dream. I, again, am lost as I wander the nights, riding the subway; for it’s the only way I feel that I’m heading somewhere. Some nights I still walk by her house and look up at her window remembering the night when it was only me and her. As the day breaks, I return back to the subway not knowing where I’m going, nor caring. I take my seat and stare out the window, watching the city sleep. As the silences sets in my mind beings to speak. ‘We should have ran away together’ I thought.

19 Mar, 2013

||

parted lips was more then enough of the stimulation I needed. I yet again rubbed her cheek softly and nuzzled my nose against hers’. I felt her body tense up and slightly flinch, but she never pushed me back. Our lips gently pressed against each others’ as our breathing greatly amplified. A silent submission of our tongues intertwining sent electric shocks through our bodies. I continued to softly trace her lips with mine, absorbing the moisture, sweetness, and warmth all formed in heavily breathed fevered hues. Time had stopped, the world was hushed, our lips wouldn’t part, we had stood like that for what had seemed like an eternity. Our lips finally pulled themselves apart and I ran my hand across her cheek again. Our eyes continued locked on each others’, but then she suddenly broke her stare with mine and looked towards the bottom of her bed. Her body lightly j***ed as a row of tears rolled down her cheek and to the edge of her chin. “I still love him…” she said meekly trembling. I slowly lifted her chin up, but she refused to look at me. Her pillow was soaked in tears and her lips quivered. I began to wipe away her tears as her lips fought to mouth the words ‘I’m sorry.'

19 Mar, 2013

|

“We should run away together” I said. Her lips slightly curled as a small smirk ran across her face. Her eyes and mine met, and though it wasn’t the first time they had, every time it was different, but yet the same. Though my comment had seen to have brought a bit of light to an overall distant exterior, I could tell by her eyes that there was a difference between what she wanted to say and the way things were. It was always a thing I comprehended but couldn’t understand. Her eyes told me everything; there were no need for words. Though her stare was piercing and intimidating behind them was an outpour of melancholy. The brightness that once must had been there was now a dim light which flickered, barely illuminating anything. These kinds of eyes I knew too well, for I have to face them every time I look in the mirror. Neither one of us had seemed to have blinked as her pillow cradled and nestled our heads closely together. This bed was made for us. I slowly ran my hand through her hair, separating every strand between my fingers. She let out a small sigh as my hand rubbed her warm cheek. The sign was a break in the silence that had fallen over us. She was different. Even when surrounded by a sea of people she stood out like an ark battling the oncoming clashing waves. She, unlike any other, was able to make me feel safe and frightened, so important and yet worthless, all at the same time. Whenever she was close to me there was nothing and no one else. She was like a poem I couldn’t remember, a song that may have never existed, and a place that I probably never been to. I had felt lost for far too long before I met her, she was my compass. Her bed, though large in size, had found itself with our bodies closely huddled, our arms tightly wrapped around one another, and our loins gently pushed against each others. Though her beauty was unquestioned, the thought of lust was the furthest thing from my mind. The feeling of her warm breath slowly escaping through her

04 Dec, 2012

Perfection existence

So new, perfect to be real To feel alive The happiness that isnt dead But here when you are Forever I wish it to be Yet, it isnt the only one I'll watch for wishing stars for every each one There will always be that question Are you real? To me, your just to perfect I love you

04 Dec, 2012

Words I thought I'd never speak

I bury my face to hide. Stifle my quiet sob. The silent thickens the darkness. Frightening thoughts creates the rain of tears. Sad, to let it get the best. He hears me and asks, concerned, "Whats wrong?" Whimpering feeling helpless. Time almost wastes. Then speaks of the words I never thought escape my hurtful thoughts. But, I hear it left out onto an ear of another being. This person I hide, I cant fight, cant...help. The real me. As I confess my deary soul I say, "help me."

04 Dec, 2012

Kiss away the tears

miles away but im falling silent my heart is never possible with you the one, the only one help stain the pain could this be real? promise me, when your not there rather than here tell me, its not a dream

25 Oct, 2012

We're in this together

Sickening lie. Mental images played throughout delusions taking away the romance we together devoted. No. No, longer we allow a mere hellbound mortal twist our derange hearts apart. Your mine to share these sweet moment for I never felt to ever feel. Im yours to remind you, your alive. Cold to touch, as a corpse but warm to hold. We can suffer but the more dominate we are to fight back. If this is war then let it be, just stay with me. Together we fight. Theres no dying tonight The only blood who shall be shed is those who get in the way. Fuck this, Im suriving to keep this everlasting. Secrets, rumors, and lies are nothing more than a amusing battle. Remember, together. Our lovely revengeful romance will be powerful. If so, forever@}-

25 Oct, 2012

What happends when time is not enough?

Whats there to say? To share? Time has just turn to rust. How long is enough? Anything to be there. A light, a hope Depart, apart a romance to decompose Love is just a ghost "No matter what, " Death can take it away No apologizes can heal this wound

25 Oct, 2012

Silent Violent

Another more "treatment" only just silence. Ever see any healing? No, at all you dont care to look Instead you wince, turning away at the scars I placed for you Yet, theres only judgement I take In moments, like these you pretend I dont exist your there in my dreams Take another beating...I can take your hit I can never take to fight back I can never hurt you...still you dont understand How can I? It tears me up inside knowing you cant see it you choose to walk away But Im here still...

07 Aug, 2012

Torment Torture

Your a true friend Stab me in the chest Where I can feel it In my horrid guilt ridden heart Destory every shred of happiness Poisioned all my blessing To only a regretful curse Convinced my deluded lies are true But my dear reckless friend, do you see me standing here? With a fragile caged heart still beating? Im standing alone.. But fighting You cant stop me but you can end me This is your game of fate, Im willing to play Endless, it may be I wont lose nor win I'll allow you to be my death accomplice Just be ready for a war

21 Jul, 2012

Imginative beauty

every confession are all drifted alike sickened by the what they speak of ignoring, it is not me...impossible shattering the image i rather see the reflection a sight, they had mention i flinch turning away thinking back on my secret i find so pleasing.... how easy can it be? damage it all to where the word beauty is just a feinging smile

21 Jul, 2012

Adoring Archenemy

millions enslaved followers just to get a taste a mastermind but immortal presence being; eurphoric addictive torture deathly coldhearted, have you not have emotions? for what horrid you bring, it appears my answer is there are you a mecriless god within your own delightful power? just how much is enough for the hearts you devored? no pity, lightly bestow, onto those whom cries bled onto notes of suicide this is what hell you create

18 Jul, 2012

Cursed blessing

Almost controlling but hypnotic A defying illusion Undying curse Though blessing, given happiness A pain to fight yet some fallen to death Have we not remind this war is delusional? Are we just prisioners in its restrain... Dont listen to the lies Just be aware of the consequences

18 Jul, 2012

Morphine Happiness

Rushing thoughts of moments my heart yearns But the thought of my dear beloved alone A warmth; Pulsing throughout I, puzzled For I havent felt in such a way Oh, the smile I see, his along the words I long to hear Sends my heart is aflutter! The warmth is washing over me Fear not, my love You were always worth the wait And I shall cradle you with this love I carry Even if the end awaits for us, Your worth the pain I can take I'll teasure the love you saved me A love, a morphine Setting the lonliness I hold astray I'll stay to feel this happiness I endure Just to feel it along with you

14 Jul, 2012

Revive

Lost of hope but theres the ghost Lying to pretend the pain isnt there Or how not a day passes grieving the loss of it all inside, sorrow places infliction upon my heart regret are the tears fighting to hold back

08 Jul, 2012

Dear, Unforgiven

Not dwelling but drowning Lost in pain for a delusion Fallen to believe ...Death, is my end near? Hear my sorrow An amusment for you to see Yet turned away. Please be the loss i never want to remember Now, walk away Tear from apart my fragile heart Never return to break whats left This suffer is enough The only scarred reminder Forever is a lie @}-

04 Jul, 2012

To you@}-

given to believe the true happiness that dies only to feel closer of a dream i adore carried to my grave and shut me out from the world carelessly left done reciting the words i cant forget one last time ending the voice i longer want to hear lay me to sleep

04 Jul, 2012

Sorrowful infliction

a loss, a lie, severing all of i've wanted varying thoughts allowing this tragic romance take me into deaths arms in temptation, i alie just to forget? to not feel this anymore? no. there isnt a sense of dying for this its not worth it

31 May, 2012

Beautiful nightmare called romance

Not a hand lay upon nor screams of bloody murder. There isnt a soul drifting from its hidden body. No elegent velvet vermillion, you call blood isnt drawn upon. No, this percious dying lie many would die for but yet we all feel its clenching grasp, roamance. Yes, the adoring wondering feeling a curse and a blessing. Another last welcome suffer I embrace. To be saved, at last in a romance so murderous I'll escape this imprisonment allowing this beautiful nightmare share my death. End my heart and rid me of my soul, drain every drop of blood in my veins just be my silent killer

22 May, 2012

Dreadful departure

Many years of confidment Deep down this isnt what I didnt meant it to be This cannot be goodbye Because I'm not ready Far away where I cannot see you Your fading away Oh how I wish I can stop this All I can only hear is your voice Your presence is just a ghost I cant let go I will not let our moments and memories die This time I'll be one to hand you roses to your grave Promise me, you'll say goodbye...

14 May, 2012

Hidden lies of imperfections

ashamed to tell the deaths im tempted i'll lie but see the tears covered behind the blood i reveal another promise bound the weakend me to break reaching for the weapon infliction for its razor kisses possible for the death i can cause all because i cannot trust myself alone with these frightening thoughts

12 May, 2012

welcoming lies

fulfill this void of a vemomous lie kill this dead hope of a dream rest in peace, my short lived happiness abandon the world i'm bearly known join along the weak as well yet, again the illusions i hold are what im capable of the greatest gift i could give you is the sacrfice of my soul

09 May, 2012

Asking for death

a desire to feel run this blade over me there isnt a soul to stop me just ghosts who watch watching my emotions leak out along with my blood and tears enjoying, is it not? covering myself in all the pain i adore simply my great pleasure i have to kill my flood emotions i cant take

09 May, 2012

Stifled fate

A deep insecurity is what i have to hide inside of me Lies within, a whisper of death Turning my back on surviving An escape to not fight this anymore Shall i end my weakness and surrender? I hear my fate calling Tempted to run off into the dark mist and disappear forever This is my confession for you to see If you're listening...

07 May, 2012

a death to foretell

isolate me from these razor sharp lies bleeding me out till i want to die theres doubt, to await and drown me in my tears to my soul its theirs the paranoia to leave because theres nothing left here with that, i'd rot in peace with every blood i spill i'm feeding my fear self-destruction i lay with infliction then it shall be i, the one holding the razor

25 Apr, 2012

Beautiful toxicant

i'll be the addict you'll be my provider only you have what i would die for with every hit i take im falling for you over and over together we'll grow weak by this toxicant romance your worth to die for if im worth your pain then i know we can make this work your my demon, my drug, my love whom possesed my heart. and still i love you for it. my burning desire to have you here with me and torture me more. I feel theres no end to this makes me believe when you say forever

25 Apr, 2012

Murderous romance

these tears only fall for you but the pain only i bring up crying at the open slit of my emotions cut and bleed but still your there taking away my heart away from my shatterd hope with only that one part of me you have the ablity to cure me as if i been ressurected so alive once again with your eternal promise leaving death a pointless matter i'd rather not have my worthless suicide take my soul to drown in hell but prefer your revengful beautiful murder be it so i love you enough to allow you to kill me i'll give you the dark satisfaction but as entwine our hearts are, let it be death together we'll face with you and only you my love

25 Apr, 2012

inflictional emotion

so devouring but its only i who can feel this not a granted wish but a unwanted pain another razor felt thought just cutting me apart just nail me back into my coffin if this you cannot take such as i in the prolonging years could this curse still be here? fearing that maybe one day, this might draw me out into the sun and burn away like a bloods***er so crazed by my own personal hell and driven to suicide? be that as it may, do i have the power to overcome it all to surive? with difficulty i can only try to fight this i wont let this kill me....

23 Apr, 2012

fearful lie

closing myself back into my coffin of festering emotions i'll carve your name into me until the day it will forever remain on my tombstone i want to keep you but im afraid i dont want to let your death be another razor cutting me your mine but this paranoia makes it hard to believe help me see through this painful lie your not doing this but im creating it i dont intend to still im only hurting myself through it all, torward the end im weak and hopeless covered in scars i made for you your there listening every i word i speak through a stifled sob softly comfort me with your undying love believing in your truth i run into your arms countless times we say i love you in the end of this raging battle you never surrender knowing your fighting for me

20 Apr, 2012

Secret pleasure

I'll paint these walls with your blood Crush your ripped out heart I want you to suffer and watch you die If I never meant nothing to then You wont mean anymore By the time your mangled body is thrown into your burning coffin And burned into ashes These thoughts are what keep me calm when I see your face again....

17 Apr, 2012

Behind the coffin door

If I ever become weak and fall Will you continue to help me kill them all? There's this guilt I hide Hearing you a state a truth I can't handle Just how long We have to stay strong Before it's all gone?

16 Apr, 2012

Broken promise

tear through me one by one falling onto the floor i'll bleed weakening with every hit but im not dying your not going to take me out not with your bullet full of lies

16 Apr, 2012

My vicious one

cut me with your razor make me bleed watch in pleasure to lick it off penetrate me to siphon my red velvet blood feel me run through your pulsing veins torture me till i cant nearly breathe then slit your lip pressed against mine for your dark romantic bloody kiss I'll grow dangerously aroused to oh how i insanely want you

16 Apr, 2012

Delusional denial

could this be my hell? trembling whisper in confindence i confess to a world mentally made up, possibly. still i stand confused even i speak not quite sure if its true if so, why would i do such a thing? at what cost? to feel? so weak and pathetic to create an existence to only hurt me? .....why?

16 Apr, 2012

your only pure bliss, lonliness

i'll leave you to see im not worth it bury it all away to die dont cry my name festering and reeking of misery theres a slight denial in forgetting all this knowing the lack power you secertly harbor in your broken soul you wont let it go but you could at least try

15 Apr, 2012

My cure, your love

Making me weak Clouding thoughts that cut away at me But what can I do? Darling I need you Stay to save me Don't let this deprive what we fought for Drain out this venom Purify my heart Intoxicate me with your love Slit my eyes open to see the heart I hide Show me that this is not forever Kill this dreadful feeling Bleed out the hope I cant see You see I cant do this alone Just remember, We're in this together

15 Apr, 2012

A taste of revenge

Burn me away like you done before There's nothing I want anymore What have you done to make everything die? Was it all a lie? When you said you'll always be here? Then disappear... Did you expect me to forget all? Or just your sick game to watch me fall? What we become? What have YOU become?

10 Apr, 2012

Mournful loss

depression cradles at your broken heart haterd clings your soul flood of emotions spills out like blood is there anything left in you anymore? or did most of what you use to be had died too though i cant say, never met the part that broken away from you but the end, she'll be there waiting reunited love then your able to feel true happiness

10 Apr, 2012

Regret

A regretful confession is said through a weak whisper Silence fills the air, No responce No remorse Theres no longer an intention to hear it After many years As death appears Not out of spite Only to keep my heart mended from the last fight You dug grave now its time for you lie in it

09 Apr, 2012

Lay me to sleep

restless im becoming listening to your soft passionate singing like a spell im falling for you've posessed my heart dirft away into a world only exist in my dreams to find you here with me, at last

03 Apr, 2012

haunting love

i wont fade not away from this love i'll forever be with you and i'll wait is it the loss? grief, sorrow, and self-loathing? cringes at the thought constant declines, to keep me here? i want this moment to be spent with you a last moment, i wont forget bury it deep in my heart my soul is forever embraced by the eternal love no longer, shall i stare into the eyes i adored this is what you wanted but not i together foever, even if our hearts die, i promise forever, and ever...

02 Apr, 2012

my homicidal dream

to remind me of my regrets are your paybacks never have i been amused of anyone else who could easily break me like you none of that will kill my desire your my drug, my addiction, my love, to be tortured by only you i want to be in beautiful agony I'll give you empowerment to show the invincibly I'm drawn to your the eyes I'll stare into before i fade away

01 Apr, 2012

together

the thoughts are there once more tells of a confession, i dare not dwell shall not hasten of this silent destruction have the best of me cannot give in the lies a**umtions blankets me with convincing whispers it wont stop, still, i wont listen i cannot let these thoughts put me to rest drowning me deep into my grave we're in this together we'll suffer, we'll kill but together we die your the last thing i want to see and hold before we grow cold our intertwine derange hearts will together stop beating i'll end my life with you to find you once again in the heart of a natural born killer we'll shred blood and steal lives, but i rather die by your hands, my beautiful murderer<3

01 Apr, 2012

devastation of this new manifestation

once the words had escaped felt inflicted, though i feel it ignorance wont help the clawing pain creeping back in my mind it'll return, the pain will burn have i done wrong? tell me, i dont want to be in the dark dont make this blame myself horrible guilt, pull me in take me in let me in within quiet nights it'll deepen i dont want this to happen

30 Mar, 2012

faint adore

theres no nights like that anymore seems to have grown darker though the stars will shine but not bright enough for me to see i wait for a wishing shooting stars glance every now and then at the empty spot next to me the lonliness sets in... i feel i cant watch the stars i admire so much, alone

18 Mar, 2012

The world wont listen

Here, i'll dig a grave The crying sky adds perfection Last moments are spent Digging my own grave I'll lay to rest And dreamt a dream I'll never wake from

17 Mar, 2012

Death wish

To have you there lying next to me In our pool of blood We'll fade Together our soul will travel with the undying love we promised our eyes fixed on each other together we'll bleed we'll rot my love, i will die for you and with you darling

15 Mar, 2012

i'll bury you

finelly gone, your heart stopped even before your death time to rid you of this world without a coffin still i'll bury you hide your body dig you away, underground for the maggots eat away at your skin no one wont notice...

15 Mar, 2012

hanging from your noose

didnt help me. didnt listen. didnt care. didnt believe me dont turn away see, im here but dead im lifelessly hanging, hanging from your noose i'll grow cold, like you my eyes fixed upon you in a way, this was done by you dead, because of you my heart may stop beating but my soul will linger...

15 Mar, 2012

broken or dead

like a corpse, rotten and stuffed into the ground buried away through my eyes, i want to feel alive not a zombie i have a soul, a heart, a undiscoverd love. i dont want to be like Them wasting away time hiding and dying. Their hearts may hurt but the manifestion itself will just eat away at it. i want a chance to be reborn. i want to be loved

15 Mar, 2012

internal suffer

to lose and wallow in misery dements my poor heart. opening my eyes to realize the torn burised slit upon my skin. what i could not recieve again are lost and never loved. tears sting my face like acid as they shred. still, i'll hide behind a smile.

05 Mar, 2012

What I've done

The words I spoken to uncover my pain I'm tired of what we pretend to be. Theres so much more to offer to become more than what we are. I stepped out of this coffin full of emotion for you. Revealed the sins to drag you down with me. Unveiled my scars you caused. Uncoverd the million lies I fed you. Was truth unbareble? Has is changed the way you see me and shut me out? Am I just now dead to you?

05 Mar, 2012

Murdering silence

Again, I'm weak. Softly I weep. I run to hide. Alone to cry. I'm tired of feeling like this sickening fraility. Theres no end to this is there? Left to decompose in all the pain of dying alone. To fear the only thing I wished, is that what I really want? I could see the purpose you possess. The thoughts you kept hidden in your worthless heart. Honestly, this is what I was afraid of but this losing has become clear to me to prove your already dead. Constantly, I've tired to keep this from happening. Forgiven, forgotten. Force to engulf thousand memories I can never relive. Makes me wonder, could I ever forgive ?

19 Feb, 2012

Prisoner/ Victim

Years i lived in the shadows of those who watch me fall. I cry for my dear savior if your out there. Help me break away from these chains. I beg of you to save my scared soul from this prison. I want to be able to feel. To smile, loved, and cared.

15 Feb, 2012

Farewell

Trapped in what seems to be your sick game knowing i'll fall victim to. And after all these years still, i entirely cannot quiet understand why are you doing this... Was this the end? In your cold stare i could see you could not care. You know the pain im suffering so why turn away?

15 Feb, 2012

Murder me

The passionate words you say to take away my pain. With just a simple smile can crush my heart. Your touch upon my skin makes me tremble of excitement. I let out a pleasurable cry as you sink your teeth into me. Your kiss, drains out the vemon in my blood. Your soft gentle hands runs through me as if you ran a cold sharp blade against my skin. An devilish grin stretches across your face once you drag the blade into me. I groan cringing at the slight pain then smile as my blood rushes out, bleeding me dry. I'll await for the night, You'll come to take me away, Just maybe tonight, You'll come to murder me with your love

04 Feb, 2012

All for you

Its getting difficult to see. I try to make it go away. because of you they fall. for you it wont stop.

04 Feb, 2012

To The End

To which I cant bring myself to stop this. I never intended for you. But, my dear notice that I asked you to leave more then once? Will you still continue to fight for such weakling? I'll never stop asking because I want the best for you. My beloved, hear me as I say this: What will it take to show I'm tired for pulling you down with me. Deeply, it pains me to know I caused this I'm sorry

03 Feb, 2012

Dearly tortured lost souls

Blade drips of the silky velvet red blood the fake smiles played upon your face hiding the smothering sorrow that drowns out happiness endlessly taking away everything that now remains meaningless. But the enduring pain is all want yet im caged inside the darkness. Whispers of lingering lost souls is all I can hear I think of escaping this twisted nightmare, but I feel like I belong here. Hollow erie silent cries tears through playful laughs covering the unheard. Very few can be listen yet many ignore. Accepting the fact that we'll never be noticed and or cared the feeling of being unwanted embaces the shatterd emotions we have left...