jpin617's Profile

Member Since: 07/06/2009
Last Login: 06/11/2019
Profile Views: 2218
Boston, United States
About Me:
I'm just trying to be happy by making my kids happy! Im a hard worker, and I love with all of my heart.

jpin617's Blog

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Jan 31 2018 9:48PM
Got A Call...
My son finally called me today! :-D I felt so happy to hear his voice! I ****ing broke down and cried cuz he sounded SO great! It was like getting a glass of cold water in the desert! Told him he needs to call me or at least send me a poop emoji...just so I can know he is okay and that he actually cares about me, HIS MOTHER.

He told me he would. He has a little girlfriend and her name is Shayna. He is like in love or something, he says. That he doesn't want to come home because of his girlfriend! I miss him SO much! I told him he could bring his damned girlfriend if that will make him wanna come home a little more! At this point, I'll take what I can have.
Hopefully I'll get some emojis or a text message from my son tomorrow! ;-)
Jan 24 2018 11:59PM
Feelin down...
Cant catch my breath... cant stay asleep at night. Look at pictures and cry. I can only think of hearing my son's voice calling me "Mom". I am suffering. I don't wish this upon anyone, :-(
Jan 12 2018 12:08PM
Sent a Hug to my son
I saw my Son's father today. He came by to grab that money I had saved for our son. When I hugged him, he smelled just like my baby... :'-( I wanted to go with him so badly so I could see my baby. All I need is a hug, and I'll be SO happy! Hopefully, this move will bring him successes and he'll be well! If I hadn't sent him to his Dad's I think I woulda lost my son to drugs He overdosed just after Thanksgiving and it led to the saddest Christmas and New Year's I have ever experienced. I didn't know how much it would hurt me not having one of my kids with me at home! Oh, Lord, please help me!! Help me overcome my sadness, and help me handle this broken heart.
Jan 11 2018 10:50PM
Heartbroken 2018
Can't believe my son is 17 years old! Its crazy that its been a whole month since he was in the hospital and then went to live with his Dad. I know I made the right decision for my son's best interest, but I still feel like a failure and so inadequate. What was I thinking?? Now I don't see him, or hear his voice. Why didn't I do more?? Why wasn't I enough of a Mom? I need my baby home with me!! All I do is pray for him to come home or tell me that he wants to come home, but I feel like he doesn't want to. I am truly heartbroken. :'(
Sep 21 2017 3:34PM
Cannot Belive It
I am very happy right now!!! I'm thinking about the future and working hard towards something good. I don't lose faith. Sometimes, when I'm feeling down, I almost want to die. But then I think of my children and the life I have had and I am grateful! I cannot simply give up. I may shut down mentally and blank out for a few....but I wake up and bring myself back up.
Sep 2 2014 6:42PM
The Day Before School starts again...
Tomorrow is the first day of school for my kids! They are both so excited! I've been able to buy them new clothes and sneakers , and they are gonna look GORGEOUS!! Hey, as long as they do well in school, I'll sacrifice my time and money to get them everything they want and need. Kids should be motivated and encouraged with each passing day, so they don't forget how important education and values are for the rest of their lives! I will show them by example, and my example will be pure JOY and LOVE for all things related to education and instilling values! May they always stay blessed, and full of courage, like their mother. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3
Aug 28 2014 12:50AM
Time Is On My Side...yes it is!
I am working, and getting out of debt. Slowly but surely... I know I can get there. Been carrying around this fire in my soul. Can't seem to figure out how to make that fire stay lit...and NEVER go out! :-*
Jul 31 2014 9:42PM
It's been a long time...
Dreaming is not something I do as much anymore. When I was younger, I had so many dreams, so many ambitions. And I thought anything was possible if I just put my mind to it. Crazy how you yourself can be the One holding you back! Crazy but true. 8)
I always think of everyone else before myself, thinking that's gonna somehow cancel out all the mistakes I've made, but also because I truly feel it in my heart. But I in reality, I need to forgive myself, and move forward. I should think of myself more, and not worry so much about others. In the end, you only have yourself. You suffer your sorrows on your own, and you overcome obstacles on your own. :D
Don't let anyone tell you You are Not worth it! Some people don't know how to be a Human Being and have empathy. They spew negativity in order to feel good about themselves. That is not what makes a person of value. A person of value, is a person who knows how much they're worth, and knows how to have humility, respect, and empathy. That is all I strive to be! And people who are not people, are nowhere near me. :-* <3
Jun 29 2014 4:24PM
I saw myself...
Today, I woke up early, but went back to sleep. :-P Last night, I had one-too-many and even threw up! Yuck! I was so ashamed of myself for not eating anything all day long! People, DO NOT drink wine or any alcohol without eating anything ALL DAY LONG!!! Lmao... I was trippin'! Thanfully, I went to sleep with my little girl in my son's room, and felt better in this morning. We're spending the day at my Mom's and I brushed my hair and put on a new shirt. Then I looked in the mirror, and felt like I looked pretty. I just looked at myself, and saw that I am still young. My hair needs to be dyed, but other than that, I should feel good about myself. Why am I letting this Man-child ruin my life? No! I need to put my foot down, as they say. But more than that, I need to find out what it is I need to do FOR MYSELF. My daughter and son need to know what is acceptable in a man, and NOT acceptable. Already, I have made the first step: I am a good example of what a good woman should be. So, there! :-*
Jun 27 2014 3:39PM
New start! :-D
I am SO happy to inform myself that I have started a new job @ Old Navy! I am so glad to be out of the house, working again, and able to start working my way up AGAIN! There are many things I have to change in order to succeed at my ultimate goal: To Own my own Home! Number one, get rid of "Cement Block chained-to-my-leg". Number two, save some money every time I get paid. Number three, re-establish my bank account, and get direct deposit. Number four, make payment arrangements for some important bills never paid and on y credit report. If I can get through "Number One", I will be well on my way! And it will be a peaceful, and progressive journey! It's just that Cement Block is so damn hard to get off! The chain is rusted and very damaged in some areas, but it's thick and wrapped around my ankle so many times! I know that it will take time to be free of it, but I feel like I'm making steady progress. After I conquer this step, it will down-hill from there! I will be flying to my objective! I am soo happy!!! :-D


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